[ did you also get stabbed. all of you stop being stabbed.
anyway, this one usually gets her to spiral a bit, so he can probably feel the misery and the overwhelming guilt that she feels. when he hugs her, she sucks in a breath, and then very carefully wraps her arms around him in return, swallowing hard. ]
[ going by the thing that vi called her, yeah, that's good for the guilt.
she nods a bit. ]
Working for the guy that you just saw. The one that killed Vander. [ there's a lot of emotion she's pushing down about this - stuff she hasn't really ever worked through. stuff that she doesn't know how to work through. ]
I don't know what happened. I didn't see it. But she was different.
[he doesn't want to make her pull away by commenting on that directly, but after a moment:]
You were just a kid. I think you'd be understanding if it was anyone else who went through that, but... I know it's different when it's something you've experienced.
[ you know, i don't know if anybody has been like, you were so young, when she's shown them this. ]
Wasn't that young. I was old enough to know better. [ she says, but he's right, she was like... fifteen. she could've made better decisions, but she didn't, because she'd just watched her entire family die. ]
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and vi, who is close by, sets off her memshare on accident like a goddamn shrapnel bomb:
(sorry it is in parts youtube is a fraud)
part one
part two
part three
part four ]
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WELL
after a second (a few seconds, honestly, given all that), he's just moving forward with a wince to hug her.]
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anyway, this one usually gets her to spiral a bit, so he can probably feel the misery and the overwhelming guilt that she feels. when he hugs her, she sucks in a breath, and then very carefully wraps her arms around him in return, swallowing hard. ]
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I'm here.
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... Yeah. Yeah, I know. [ just, there's more guilt, and the distant thought that she doesn't really deserve to have people in her corner. ]
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[sympathetic]
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Ugh. I hate - I hate that one the most out of all of them.
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That was your sister, right? Was she okay? Were you okay?
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We both lived. Obviously for me. [ she's not sure if she can say they're... okay... ]
I got arrested about five seconds after that. When I got out, it was seven years later and she was going around calling herself Jinx. So.
[ y'know. not great. ]
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Hah - hah, no. Stillwater's the place you go when people want to vanish you, man. She didn't know where I went.
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[after a moment]
I'm glad you found her eventually, but you said she was going by different name...?
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she nods a bit. ]
Working for the guy that you just saw. The one that killed Vander. [ there's a lot of emotion she's pushing down about this - stuff she hasn't really ever worked through. stuff that she doesn't know how to work through. ]
I don't know what happened. I didn't see it. But she was different.
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It isn't your fault that you weren't there. You know that, right?
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It was, actually, that whole - all of that was on me. I led them into the mess that got us there.
[ the guilt is... oppressive. she glances away. ]
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There's no fixing it now, so it doesn't... really matter.
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You were just a kid. I think you'd be understanding if it was anyone else who went through that, but... I know it's different when it's something you've experienced.
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Wasn't that young. I was old enough to know better. [ she says, but he's right, she was like... fifteen. she could've made better decisions, but she didn't, because she'd just watched her entire family die. ]