[anyways he doesn't know what to do with these but he thinks they might be important graveyard peas so he just awkwardly slips them into a pocket for lack of any other container i'm going to tpk]
They're probably bored over there. They might not have a lot of things to do, you know. I mean, even I got messages from one of them earlier this week.
[YOU HAVE TO BE SO BORED TO TEXT SCARAMOUCHE.]
Well, assuming they came from that side at all. Could be something from the auditors, I guess?
[all of this will also be useless to him but he turns over his phone to show the following messages:
Hey there, Princey. Everything's fine on this side, if you ever end up here. Same as it is over there, pretty much, at least for now. Take care of the team. You got good sense. Better than the rest of us. I hope you can get home to your mister soon.
the hateful clown one is next i don't know if it will copy paste correctly
Toll Violation Notice:
This is your final notice regarding the unpaid toll balance on your account. You must settle the balance within the next 12 hours to avoid severe penalties.
Unpaid Balance: $3.99 Due Date: June 28, 2025
Failure to pay within this time frame will result in the following:
1.Immediate addition of late payment fees to your balance 2.Suspension of your vehicle registration by the Department of Motor Vehicles (DMV) 3.Collection actions, including a negative report to your credit file Please make your payment promptly to avoid these severe consequences and protect your driving privileges.
If the link fails, reply with 'Y', exit the SMS, and reopen it to activate the link, or copy and paste it directly into your browser to complete your payment.
This is your last opportunity. Pay now to avoid irreversible consequences.
Pease porridge hot, pease porridge cold, Pease porridge in the pot, nine days old; Some like it hot, some like it cold, Some like it in the pot, nine days old.]
[THESE ARE ALL SO INSANE WHEN PUT TOGETHER. He just leans over to read the messages and then nods.]
And then the peas. Peas seem to be a theme?
[What is pease. Damn. Maybe it's a typo. South did this. Anyway he'll pull out his phone too which he usually doesn't have on him but conveniently does for this thread because someone needs to see these fucking messages.
First it's a drawing on the notes app of a stick figure cowboy sticking his tongue out and flipping off the viewer.
Then it's the clown braille and metro ticket warning, which is the same.
Then it's: Dear Scaramouche, Thank you for coming with Haru to my birthday party! It was funny when we went down the mat slide and you ended up in the other lane. You wiped out and sunk to the bottom, and we had to pull you up by a handful of your hair. I won't ever forget it. You said you would never go back again, but I hope you change your mind next year! -Your Best Friend]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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moves his phone over so scara can see the message]
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He genuinely doesn't know whether this is more hilarious or more stupid, but it is both.]
Wow.
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[omnipresent girl help our peas]
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It could almost sound like a threat if it wasn't so stupid.
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Why would it be a threat?
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[OMINOUS TBH!]
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[DON'T JUST RAWDOG PEAS.]
Everyone's been too depressed to talk about their raw peas, though, I guess.
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[anyways he doesn't know what to do with these but he thinks they might be important graveyard peas so he just awkwardly slips them into a pocket for lack of any other container i'm going to tpk]
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You're just going to keep them?
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[WHY WOULD THEY BE IMPORTANT]
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In what way do you think they could possibly be important?
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[They Would]
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[YOU HAVE TO BE SO BORED TO TEXT SCARAMOUCHE.]
Well, assuming they came from that side at all. Could be something from the auditors, I guess?
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[anyways he gets distracted by this possibility even if i eli know it was not the auditors.]
Why would they send me peas...?
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[It was a funny rude little note that Scaramouche saw once and then never replied to. JUST LEAVES EVERYONE ON READ. He shrugs, though.]
Why would either of those two dead ones?
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[anyways he has no answer to this so he just keeps contemplating the turn of fate that left him peas]
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[THE BRAILLE CLOWN...]
But no. I got something before that.
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[thinks about what he knows about scaramouche]
I'll show you what I've gotten if you do the same.
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He looks faintly amused, partially for that but also:]
It will be useless to you, but I'm amenable to a trade. Yours first.
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Hey there, Princey. Everything's fine on this side, if you ever end up here. Same as it is over there, pretty much, at least for now. Take care of the team. You got good sense. Better than the rest of us.
I hope you can get home to your mister soon.
the hateful clown one is next i don't know if it will copy paste correctly
Toll Violation Notice:
This is your final notice regarding the unpaid toll balance on your account. You must settle the balance within the next 12 hours to avoid severe penalties.
Unpaid Balance: $3.99
Due Date: June 28, 2025
Failure to pay within this time frame will result in the following:
1.Immediate addition of late payment fees to your balance
2.Suspension of your vehicle registration by the Department of Motor Vehicles (DMV)
3.Collection actions, including a negative report to your credit file
Please make your payment promptly to avoid these severe consequences and protect your driving privileges.
Pay Now:
https://metro.com-edg.win/pay
If the link fails, reply with 'Y', exit the SMS, and reopen it to activate the link, or copy and paste it directly into your browser to complete your payment.
This is your last opportunity. Pay now to avoid irreversible consequences.
Pease porridge hot, pease porridge cold,
Pease porridge in the pot, nine days old;
Some like it hot, some like it cold,
Some like it in the pot, nine days old.]
...And then the peas.
[the peas]
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And then the peas. Peas seem to be a theme?
[What is pease. Damn. Maybe it's a typo. South did this. Anyway he'll pull out his phone too which he usually doesn't have on him but conveniently does for this thread because someone needs to see these fucking messages.
First it's a drawing on the notes app of a stick figure cowboy sticking his tongue out and flipping off the viewer.
Then it's the clown braille and metro ticket warning, which is the same.
Then it's:
Dear Scaramouche,
Thank you for coming with Haru to my birthday party! It was funny when we went down the mat slide and you ended up in the other lane. You wiped out and sunk to the bottom, and we had to pull you up by a handful of your hair. I won't ever forget it. You said you would never go back again, but I hope you change your mind next year!
-Your Best Friend]
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[looking at the last one for a long moment...]
Any idea who sent that?
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