pc catchall for alex

[agleam]

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[agleam]

Why did she want it?

[bxkautx]

She wanted to see her parents again. To live in a moment before they died—forever.

[agleam]

[that - makes him pause, expression first going slack with surprise and then tightening.]

Does she actually want that, Alex, or is she grieving?

[bxkautx]

The two aren't mutually exclusive.

[agleam]

It's forever. Is she going to want the same thing in a month? A year?

[bxkautx]

How long does she have to want it before you accept it? It had already been four years by the time she reached out to me.

[agleam]

[after a moment:]

...I don't know what I would have done if I was in your situation. I like to think I would have said no, though. [...] How long were you stuck like that?

[bxkautx]

There was a time when I would have said no. If it had been... early enough, maybe.

But I was there for eternity.

[agleam]

[hm. suddenly a lot makes sense!]

...I'm sorry.

[bxkautx]

[ she hesitates... ]

It would have worked, probably. But I—backed out, sort of, and in the end the choice was up to Riley. So. If you're worried about Olivia, don't bother.

[agleam]

[after a moment:]

You backed out - why?

[bxkautx]

Bigger threat.

I just wanted to switch places with someone willing. The other ghosts wanted to tear their way through the whole coastline.

[agleam]

Why would they do that?

[bxkautx]

Being in there erodes your sense of self. Your identity, your morals, your face, name, memories. Anger is the easiest thing to hold onto. And it grows the more you fail to escape.

[agleam]

But... You managed to resist that, at least enough to back out when things started going wrong?

[bxkautx]

Guess so.

[agleam]

[thinks about asking more about that specifically, but.]

...So what happened in the end?

[bxkautx]

The gate was sealed safely. With me as the deadbolt—again.

[agleam]

[a little softer:]

Then... How did you get out eventually, to your last round?

[bxkautx]

Gave up on trying to find a way out. Gave up on—living, in whatever capacity you could call that a life.

Died, went to Hell. Etcetera.

[agleam]

[...]

I know you think it doesn't matter, but - you didn't deserve any of that.

[bxkautx]

Sweet of you to say, but that's the thing.

Deserved or not, it happened. Judgment was cast.

[agleam]

I know that.

[bxkautx]

... Deserving is a pretty complicated, uh... concept, anyway.

[agleam]

What do you think about it?